My wife sent me this information the other day and I think it's really important. I wish I could shout some of these words from a mountain. But I don't have a mountain to shout from so I'll just drop a blog post.
"A child psychologist recently shared an important insight about prolonged potty-training resistance—and it reframes how we look at the problem. When potty training doesn’t happen even after years of trying, it’s often assumed to be a behavioral issue. In reality, in most cases, it is sensory and neurological, not defiance. Many children who remain in diapers for several years lose awareness of their body signals.
Highly absorbent diapers prevent the child from feeling wetness or discomfort. Over time, the brain learns to tune out the sensation of peeing, treating it as background noise.
The neural connection between the bladder and brain weakens due to lack of sensory feedback. So when a 4-year-old is asked, “Tell me when you need to go,” they may genuinely not know. They are not being stubborn or dishonest-the signal simply isn’t registering. This also explains why pull-ups often don’t help. They function very similarly to diapers, absorbing moisture instantly and continuing to block sensory input.
Without feedback, the brain has no opportunity to relearn the cause-and-effect relationship.
Potty awareness develops through experience: Feeling the urge, feeling wetness, connecting the sensation to action. Children who begin training earlier—often around 18 months to 2 years—still have an active sensory loop. Their brain hasn’t yet learned to ignore those signals, especially when caregivers routinely introduce toilet habits. For older toddlers or preschoolers, potty training is not just about learning a new skill—it’s about rebuilding body awareness that was never fully developed.
This understanding shifts the focus from blame or pressure to sensory re-education, patience, and consistency. With the right approach, the body/brain connection can be rebuilt, and progress becomes possible without shame or power struggles."
I'm not here to judge. I'm here to help.
Our daughter used store-bought disposables and I witnessed the truths of this post play out for years. It took her a long time to ditch the comforts of her Up & Up diapers. Our son—who used cloth and bamboo disposables—turned two a few months ago and is diaper free. We only use them at night but that seems to be coming to an end soon as well. The biggest difference is that Alma never knew she was wet or uncomfortable, and Jack did.
We took two diapering paths and our potty training went two ways. I want everyone to have the same experience me, my wife, and our son had thanks in large part to the diapers we used on him.
